Friday, December 17, 2010

All I want for Christmas...

Let's give the guy his due, Michael Vick has been a good boy this year.  He's having a stellar season at QB for the Eagles, not to mention the fact that he hasn't engineered a single multi-level animal brutality organization in years.  I think Santa needs to take note of that.
Recently Vick told ESPN about one thing that he really wants, and it's something he may want to consider jotting down on the old Christmas wish list, because like so many other little boys Mikey just wants a puppy.
That got me thinking what else might be on the wish lists of some fairly newsworthy folk:

- Ben Roethlisberger wants "breaking out your penis in public" to be considered a legitimate courtship technique.
- Mel Gibson wants his career back on track... oh and also for Hollywood to not be so "Jewy."
- Charles Manson wants to have jailhouse slumber parties without the warden always giving him shit about what he's doing in a "group meeting."
- The country as a whole wants Willow Smith forced back into Jada's womb.
- Marv Albert wants, just once, to solicit a prostitute without being pestered about that "whole back biting thing."
- Eddie Murphy wants to stop making bad movies even though they feel sooooo good.
- Tiger Woods wants it to not burn so much when he pees, and for his 4 iron to stop giving him head wound flashbacks.
- Roman Polanski wants to leave film behind and become a middle school teacher.

This is likely my last post until the new year so enjoy your holidays everyone, and I hope you get whatever asinine and undeserving gift you're asking Santa for this year you jerk... Merry Christmas!

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